Circus Central

I suppose I expect every guy I like to like me back .

I suppose I expect every guy I hate to not leave me alone .

Maybe one day when I realize truely that there ARE guys that look at me everyday, I'll not be so depressed about the one guy who doesn't.

I suppose I turn most people off , and a select few on .

I suppose I'm the only person who thinks I'm genually ugly .

Maybe when I realize that if I'm fine with being weird around my friends and not my crush, I'll stop worrying about what he thinks.

I suppose I'm the only person who can make the right decision and then regret it later .

I suppose I'm the only person who can tell others what to do and then do the same , and wish I had been a hypocrite.

Maybe I'll realize doing the right thing should be a good thing, and start doing the right thing more often.

I suppose I could tell myself many times that I will or will not do something, and then do the complete opposite.

I suppose I could say that I'll clean my room and stop cussing, but it's like drugs..

I don't care if my room is dirty, but I feel better when it's clean.

My friends nor do I mine if I cuss, but what if one say it just slips out in front of an adult?

In an interview, at a press confrence?

What if I become famous, and I'm some type of role model at age 15 for little boys and girls, and my makeup bag falls out in the airport and I exclaim "Oh shit!' in front of reporters that would exploit me and destroy my career?

I suppose I know I'm not a great poet. I'm no Robert Frost. But I

I suppose I know I'm not the most popular person in the clique I want to hang out with, but I know I might be pretty popular in the clique I'm supposed to be in.

I suppose I know that I might like looking at scene kids, but I know I'm downright girly with a sporty touch. I will admit I went through a phase where I thought I wanted to be like that, and I thought..

Is that how I want to make my hair?

Is that what I want to listen to?

Is that what I want to buy?

Is that the store I want to basically live in?

Maybe I just need to pursue what I KNOW I can do.

Maybe I need too stop trying to IMPRESS everybody,

and start just impressing MYSELF.

Maybe I also need to stop writing bad poetry? XD

-mariahh(;

Just letting ya'll know I'm done with the transfers!

From now on, I will be posting posts about my problems on this site.

I'll be posting everything else on this site.

Thanks again for reading, commenting, ect.

See you around the web!

<3,

!~RAWR!, Asifsys23, Asifsys90, cookiesnukey, Mars, Mariah-Kan, and xomariah

First Posted On: Thursday, March 26, 2009

I promise this post will be short~

I wish he would just.. I don't know..

Not be so shy?

That could work for everybody..

Thursday, March 26, 2009

LOL~ I've been playing my dream alter-ego Mariah-Kan, an American fairy undergoing an Asian name.

She moved away from her home in Fairytropolis and moved to Sanriotown~ theland where Hello Kitty and her family and friends live.

Recently,she discovered that Sanriotown doesn't have a store that carriesfairy-friendly clothes; and she's decided to open a shop of her own-Fairytropolis Exported

Rightnow, Mariah-Kan her family that has flown in from Fairytropolis areorganizing and preparing for a Bake Sale. The money will be used to buya building permit and supplies, since MK doesn't feel like theaccomplished anything when she just buys it. All fairy things are home-made.

She isn't well know yet; but she will be soon! She posts on any of the major Sanriotown character blogs; Mimmy White, Kuromi, Hello Kitty herself, Cinnamoroll, and a few made-up characters like me,UsaBunnBunn, Pink Bear, Lily Cat, and a few LiveJornal characters, suchas Aniki~ and Kuriomi posts there as well. My Melody as well? Yea- hertoo.

Hello Kitty Online is current in the process of preparing for Open Beta~ sheposts on a few HKOers, such as victorsaurus and RippleCloud.If you wanna see the blog, and maybe join SanrioTown yourself, then you can visit these links:http://blog.sanriotown.com/asifsys23:hellokitty.com

www.sanriotown.com

Thanks,and here are some pics of Mariah-Kan! I told you~ she's a blue fairy! (Oh yea.. and the mic is because normal people and bigger animals can't hear her ting voice!)

First Posted On: Thursday, March 26, 2009 

OMFG~ HE HASN'T DONE ANYTHING YET? -Dylan B.-

You're been under a lot of stress lately.. I hope you eventually get together with him -Sidney L-

Don't worry about it dude- he's either a shy idiot or a idiotic shy person; it's never both - Sandiiii<3-

I can threaten to kill him, you know!" Fine, go then." *leaves* *comes back later* I can't do it alone.. *motions to get me out of there* *we sneak out* *Ms. T follows us down the hallway* BUSTED~ -Dante S-

Look, you may as well give up.. but then again, once I'm gone.. you're the next one in! - Hector (what's his last name?)-

DON'T DO IT, MAAAAAAAAN!! - Liz S.-

MAMA SAID KNOCK U OUTTTT... I'M GUNNA KNOW U OUTTTTTT! - Oreal xDD (cutie kider)

Now,do you see? Everybody knows.. and you can't do anything about it. Ican't do anything either.. but you may as well embrace it and get overyour fear, right?I'm doing the same thing..BTW~ those comments above? ^^ that's only a THIRD of what I've gotten.SO HURRY UP DAMMIT.

First Posted On: Friday, March 13, 2009

Hmm.. for some reason I've been really into international singers and bands.. and I'll start with Declan Galbraith!

Declan Galbraith (born Declan John Galbraith, 19 December 1991, Hoo St Werburgh, Kent) is an English singer of Scottish and Irish origin. He and his family live in Hoo, a village near Rochester, Kent. His grandfather was in a band, played several instruments, and took Galbraith to Fleadhs (concerts) he was participating in, and the mix of Scottish and Irish musical

traditions inspired Galbraith and became his early musical influence.[1]

(from Wikipedia)

If you want to know what songs to start with, start with Tell Me Why, An Angel, Ego You, and You and Me. Move on to others if you want(:

(warning.. the sssss in An Angel might be hella-annoying, unless you ignore them)

Next.. I'm going to inteoduce ya'll to Tokio Hotel.. my current favorite German band.

Tokio Hotel [?to?kio ho?t?l] is a German band founded in Magdeburg, Germany in 2001 by singer Bill Kaulitz, guitarist Tom Kaulitz, drummer Gustav Schäfer and bassist Georg Listing.[8]

The quartet have scored four number one singles and have released two

number one albums in their native country, selling nearly 5 million CDs

and DVDs there.[9] After recording an unreleased demo-CD under the name "Devilish" and having their contract with Sony BMG terminated, the band released their first German-language album, Schrei, as Tokio Hotel on Island Records in 2005. Schrei sold more than half a million copies worldwide[10] and spawned four top five singles in both Germany and Austria. In 2007, the band released their second German album Zimmer 483 and their first English album Scream which have combined album sales of over one million copies worldwide and helped win the band their first MTV Europe Music Award for Best InterAct. The former, Zimmer 483, spawned three top five singles in Germany while the latter, Scream, spawned two singles that reached the top twenty in new territories such as Portugal, Spain and Italy. In September 2008, they won their first MTV Video Music Award for Best New Artist. They also picked up the Headliner award at the MTV Europe Music Awards 2008 held in Liverpool on 6 November 2008.

(from Wikipedia!)

I love Tokio Hotel.. and the lead singer Bill looks like a girl but when you get past it, he's GEORGEOUS! I can only reccamond Monsoon rightnow; and it's not that good but if you like it, you like it! I know I do(: Thanks guys, if you like any international singers let me know(:

First Posted On: Sunday, March 08, 2009

I WON! OH YEA! WOOTWOOT!

Not yet.. but I'm sooo close. I know he likes me so all that's left is toget over the shyness.. because everytime Mill & Sid get involved orwe get close one of us backs off o_O

I can't help but be nervous.. xD

(P.S.-Aunt Tina gave me a 90! I aimed for like, a 85 o_O She said it wasreally good, so I should keep recording until I get him )

(P.S.S.- I'm VERY obsessed with music at the moment! I'm working on a playlist for my profile, don't worry.)

(P.S.S.S.- If I ever mention your name in any of my blogs, too darn bad.You shouldn't bug me so much I need to let off steam in a blog.)

 First Posted On: Friday, January 09, 2009

PART I- 17 EMOTIONS WITHIN 3 HOURS!

source: Sidney, my own ears and eyes.. xD

>_< O.K... just when I thought this whole thing was over..Today was a Friday.. so I was at REACH all day. Nice.

Apparently Mrs.Connell's class won a pizza party (that I didn't know about *@_@*) outside so I'm sittin.. eatin pizza.. teasing Liz (Workman's class) by waving it in front of her face.. and then BAMM!- Huong did it..

"*******, come here!"

"You better not.."

"Too late! Come on, make eye contact!"

"Huong STOP IT!"

"Oh well.." So then Sidney attempt to push me into him and Huong pushed him and tries to make us turn around.. we both cover our face xD

"Ooooooooooo.." says the surrounding people.. *Won't say names, but you know who you are..*

"COME ON! DON'T BE STUBBORN!"

So then I walked away.

 I come back and I see this..

"Do you like her?"

"I don't know.."

"Are you sure?"

"I said I didn't know.."

"Are you VERY sure?"

"UGH!"

Then the rest I don't knowww..

So, erm, I just NOW figured that out at PACE so for about 2 hours.. (Sidney was at B.B. practice, told me when she got back) I was thinking that he said NO.. but he said I DON'T KNOW..

PART II- KEYSHA COLE IS BUSTED!

source: M.C. Jordan

His X-Girlfriend, *oh this is hilarious..*

"I WAS going to break up with *******.. but I can't resist those BIG BROWN EYES! *sigh*"

Look who's desperate now.. *heh heh heh..* BUSTED!

(gasp) I feel better I like blogs!

 First Posted On: Thursday, December 18, 2008 

Okkkk, well, this Omarion thing is over. He doesn't like me, and I'm forgetting about him.I got this forward from a friend and it REALLY explains how I feel, so I copy and pasted it exactly:

its sad when people you know,

became the people you knew.

When you can walk right past

someone like they were never a big part of your life.

How you used to be able to talk for hours and now you can barely look at them...

Well actually, that reminds me of someone else..

Anyways, I was stuck in a room for 2 hours alone with THE crunkest & ghettoest 6th grade girls at Skyview, it was scary xD Well I told one of them how I was thinking of changing if that's what guys want, but then I got to thinking.. there are some guys that appreciate who you are on the inside, and you don't need to change for them. So, just remember, if you even come across a guy you REALLY like but they want some crunk ghetto wannabe that has bad English and can do the soulja boy and ricky bobby and all that crap, he's not you for if that's not you. So, guess I'll be single for a few more 10 years =P

First Posted On: Saturday, December 13, 2008

Alright, Aikin friends, just pretend you know what I'm talking about and Skyview, figure it out because you all know what's going on.

I normally don't write blogs but I'm SUPER upset, and I figured this would be good. Well, I won't use full/real name and embarrass anybody since we all know each other, but..

"Omarion" found out I liked him, right? So he and Mill planned to write a fake love letter to me just to play a joke, he didn't like me at all. That I know of.

Well, Mill convinced Omarion to just give me one chance. Now the question is, am I making a mistake? Am I really going to take the chance? I'm not sure.. because, here's the things:

1. He cheats, like, 24/7. Those all A's were a M-I-S-T-A-K-E.

2. He already has a girlfriend, (I call her Keysha Cole), and he seems tolike her. I heard he WANTS to give me a chance, but then I don't know.

3.That whole love letter thing set me back. I found out Friday, thank god for my spirit-sister Liz for telling me everything she knew: seriously, I could have been excited to tell Omarion "yes" on Monday if it wasn't for her.

Sooooo..I guess I feel better now. I'll think more over the weekend, before Isay "yes", I'll have to know all I know before I say it. It's almost like getting on the Texas Giant. Once you're on, you can't get off unless you use a remote-control to stop the ride.

HE'S SO CUTEEEE!! BUT SO WRONGGGG!!

P.S.- Skyview, it's seriously obvious who I'm talking about.

Aikin- Sorry, you'll just have to stay clueless! Now you know what's going on with me.